HIDE. PAINT. SNITCH.

A ten-minute round in a Soviet apartment block. Up to seven of you are the tenants. One of you is the NKVD. The NKVD has a dog. The dog has a hat.

PAINT YOURSELF INTO THE FLAT

Take a color from the wallpaper with the eyedropper, paint your body by hand, back into the wall — and freeze. The pattern runs straight from the carpet onto you. Take one step and it doesn't. A perfect paintjob is invisible. A sloppy one is unforgettable.

THE DOG HEARS YOUR HEART

The closer she gets, the louder it beats — for both of you. She can't open doors. Paws.

THE FUSES WILL BLOW

Twice a round the block's fuses go. An address is called out. Someone has to leave a perfectly good hiding spot, cross the building and reset the meter in a stranger's flat. Nobody goes? Blackout: fifteen seconds of darkness and spinning red emergency lights — and the NKVD confiscates the furniture you were painted as.

YOUR FRIENDS ARE THE PROBLEM

Call the landline in a friend's flat and let it ring. Invite them for a smoke break they physically have to walk to. Or open the menu and become the snitch: walk in the open, take compromising photos, point the NKVD at everyone. The tenants get one tip about where the snitch went. What they do to him ends up on the Wall of Shame.

THE ANTHEM

When the NKVD plays the anthem, everyone stands at attention. Everyone. For twenty seconds. Right where you are.

FROM THE LIFE OF THE COLLECTIVE

Every photo taken during the session goes up on the courtyard newspaper board. Every mugshot too. The grannies on the bench have opinions about your camouflage.

• 2–8 players online, ten-minute rounds, no classes, no unlocks — just paint and bad decisions

• One block: three floors, a basement, a courtyard. Home if you grew up there. A museum of weird if you didn't.

• Dry, bureaucratic, absurd. Not a history lesson.